I haven't written in HOW long? I look on this blog and it seems like I fell asleep one day and am just now waking up. I would say I miss blogging but apparently I don't because I haven't been on in so long and I haven't really thought about it since. I'm in my last semester as an undergrad here at USF. I'm kind of excited but I'm more scared than anything. I hate change, and I especially hate the idea of moving back home to Ormond Beach. I am praying most diligently that God will open up some doors here in Tampa so I can stay here and work. My church is here, my friends are here, I'm a much better person here.
I'm in Poetry II this semester and I'm loving it. The poems I'm writing are so different from when I was in Poetry I, and I freak myself out a little bit by how odd they are. I don't want to post them on here because apparently that's self-publishing and I'd rather try and get them published for real.
I came on here to write that the last 3 weeks have been pretty surreal. For reasons I feel the need to be ambiguous about, I feel lonely lately. I miss my best friend and I miss thinking that I knew what was going to happen to me in the future. I hate feeling unsure. I hate my feelings. I "feel" as though all I have right now is God (for comfort) and poetry (as an outlet). Friends try their best to make me feel better, and I thank them for it. But all they can really do is try.
