One Year Five Months

That's how long Eli and I have been dating :)


I missed church this morning and I really regret it. When I woke up I felt like my head was congested because my nose was stuffy and my throat had stuff running down the back of it. I cannot, cannot CANNOT get sick right now. I have two, ten page papers due Thursday. A french final paper due next Monday. Two short stories to revise by Tuesday.
PRESSURE. PRESSURE. PRESSURE.

God is good though, I slept in, and when I woke up and took a shower it opened up my sinuses and I think I'm good to go at least for today. Hopefully.

Reflection:
I appreciate my parents so much more than I ever have before. I'm so thankful for their guidance, their love and support. I'm most thankful for their earnestness and how they push for me to persevere in my faith as well as my studies. They are so supportive of Eli and I.
I love that I can talk to them about the things I struggle with over here in Tampa and they are AWESOME listeners.

I think everyone should move out just so they can appreciate their parents. Sometimes you have to get away from something to see it's worth.


Better get going on these crazy assignments.
Christmas Break in T-minus 11 days (including weekends and days in between finals).

<3 rachel

Business in the front, Party in the back!

Waiting at the apt. with katie. we don't want to get to the game to early because it's pretty freakin' cold out. and what's the fun in walking around a bunch of drunk people who spill their beer on your shoes?
actually it can be fun making fun of them but NOT when you wear their drink for the rest of the game.

games at 3:30, we're playing miami. I really hope we win.

Thanksgiving was amazing. I love my grandparents and I'm so thankful for them. They're only in their mid 60's so I've been able to really spend alot of quality time with them growing up because they're so young for grandparents.

I got to see my parents new house in Hunter's Ridge and it's SUPER nice, I love it!!!
They aren't posting pictures though until they're all finished with their redecorating and moving etc.


Christmas wish-list:
-bache ball
-bowlo (game with golf balls and rope; really fun)
-clothes

that's pretty much it. I don't need much or even want much for that matter.


AND I have soooo much to do this week, it hurts to think about it.
Winter break is just around the corner but it's a scary corner we're fast approaching.


<3 rachel

Hilarious.

Some people are not very educated and it shows in the way that they argue, joke, complain, LIVE.

It doesn't make me any better than them as a person just because I am educated.

It does, however, mean that there are somethings that I'm going to know more about BECAUSE I am the one who paid money to go to school to learn about it.


People are so dramatic--yes yes yes, we all know it to be true.


Kids, go to college so you don't look stupid on facebook.

Don't be so Flustered.

Some people are so frantic and disheveled. Calm down a minute. Inhale. It's so funny to watch people like that because I know that there are most certainly times when I look like that myself. It's another thing that I'm working on.

American's are so weird in the way that we just bluster about saying we have so much to do and yadda yadda to get people's attention because we WANT that attention. But the second anybody tries to give their advice or input, we tell them to stay out of our business, or a classier way of saying it is that they don't need to worry about it. Then why make it public? I don't think it's just Americans that are this selfish and disillusioned. I think different cultures manifest this in different ways.

Pet Peeve: I hate it when people are habitually late. COME ON. It's sooo rude to constantly be that person who doesn't know how to show up on time.

I feel like my blogs are getting a little random and disorganized. I think that sometimes, that's okay.

Torn

Don't have time to correct or submit magical realism piece for Thread--oh well, more opportunities to come.


How am I supposed to tame some of my emotions? I know, for sure, that I'm supposed to do that. It's just really hard. I feel like I'm not even allowed to express what I'm thinking sometimes because it might piss someone off. I need prayer for this because I know I need to be honest but I need to keep to myself things that aren't uplifting to others. Hopefully this is something I can get a better grasp on, through the Lord's help, in His good time.


French IV paper sucks.

Probably won't get much sleep tonight.

Getting 5 cavities filled tomorrow (awesome).

I have class the day before Thanksgiving, therefore I really don't have much of a Thanksgiving break after all.

If I want to spend the rest of my life with someone, how do I act kindly towards the people I don't like that are going to be in my life while they are in his?

Will I really figure out what I want to do?

Nutter Butters are the bomb.

I'm procrastinating.

If I have to constantly remind myself of something, do I really believe it?

I don't care if people don't like Twilight. It's neat.

There's too much "big" in this world. Including the size of people...ha. (I include myself in this).

I want to read recreationally this Winter Break.

Flowers die too quickly.

Durrrrr.

How to Throw Acorns at Trees cont'd.

BAH. I just changed my font.
Story:

The lack of creamer in my refrigerator forced me to pass on making my own coffee, and get out of the apartment earlier to enjoy some Starbucks on campus. The weather was perfect. Almost chilly but not too cold for me to get an Iced Vanilla Latte. The Starbucks in the library is always packed and I wasn't even going to consider reading in there because their comfy seats are never vacant. Plus, Devon Delamarter was expecting me to be in my usual spot on the second floor quiet area (even though he and I just sit and gossip the whole time and eat our food loudly). Turns out, one of the four velvet, green comfy chairs was available...so I took it, quickly. I read for a while, people watched; my time there was enjoyably spent.

Devon eventually showed up in a tizzy because I was not on the second floor but we decided it would be best to do our chatting outside because the weather was permitting. We chose a bench outside of Cooper Hall and it just so happened to be under some rather large trees. Devon proceeded to gather acorns and throw them, over my head, at the huge palm tree. This soon, was not enough. He scooped the acorns into his Starbucks lid but was unsatisfied with the excess leaves and mulch. Devon sat down, tired of bending over and says loudly, "Rachel, I'm tired of bending over. Gather acorns for me". When I refused, he yelled even louder, "SUBMIT TO ME".

I think people walking by would find this behavior rather unusual...I, however, did not. Aside from all of the yelling absurdities, I don't find it too strange that Devon found such deep satisfaction in throwing endless amounts of acorns at the same tree, over, and over, and over again. He tried upping the game by throwing two at a time, but it was not as satisfying. The simplest, mindless games we create with ourselves are somehow the most interesting and time consuming. We judge others so quickly when they are doing something weird, but how many times a day do we set make believe goals that only we know about? Throwing acorns at trees is the same as racing someone to a stop light. It's the same as seeing how far you can spit your finger nails after you gnawed them off. It is also trying not to step on the crack of the sidewalk. All of these things don't matter but when they're in your mind, you can't stop thinking about them or playing these games.

I think we all throw Acorns at Trees.


<3 rachel

How to Throw Acorns At a Tree

COMING SOON!

we're writing a flash fiction piece in our "Form and Technique of Fiction" class and I think that's going to be my title. Or not, who knows. I never write it too far in advance of the deadline sooo I'm thinking since it's due Tuesday I'll probably end up writing it Monday night.

Monday is the deadline for any submissions to Thread. Thread is a literary journal at USF...you can submit short stories, poems, essays, ANYTHING. I'm considering my Magical Realism piece. According to Devon, it was my home-run this semester. I'm nervous about submitting it though because although I know I have nothing to lose, it would be my first time since first grade trying to get something "published". Obviously, if I want to write anything and have people read it and sell it I have to get it published but I'm horrified of rejection. I feel like I take my writing personally and when people don't like what I write, it's like they don't like what's inside of me. I know that's not actually true, but it's how I feel.


Homecoming Carnival on campus tonight was pretty fun. Heather and I went together and we rode the Farris Wheel after waiting in line for an HOUR. Neither of us was scared at first...I got scared right before it was our turn. Heather got scared after we got buckled in and we started going backwards. We both ended up screaming loudly and laughing at what babies we were hahahaha.


Maybe I'll write a short story about carnies.

<3 rachel

"Not Quite What I Was Planning"

These are Six-Word Memoirs by ordinary people who submitted their stories, within 6 words to a magazine who published their memoirs in a book.

"After Harvard, had baby with crackhead"- Robin Templeton

"I'm my mother and I'm fine"-K. Bertand

"Boy, if I had a hammer"- Tim Barkow

"I was a Michael Jackson impersonator" - Keith Knight

"Happiest when ignoring huge financial debt"- Ayanna Bryan

"Now I blog and drink wine"- Peter Bartlett

"Found great happiness in insignificant details"- Alisdair McDiarmid

"Said goodbye, hasn't shut up since" - Michael Collins

"It was embarrassing, so don't ask"- Alex Lindquist

"Artsy married Fartsy, has two kids"- Mary Organ


Some of my six-word memoirs:

I hate the dentist; bad teeth.

Can't be mom, I'm your girlfriend.

Tired of cleaning up after you.

Took lots of pictures, laughs now.

Patience is a virtue, it sucks.

Could live without cellphone and computer.

Could not live without my chocolate.

too much to say about today, not enough time to write about it.

this is me making notes on the things i'd like to write about soon:

-how the show "so you think you can dance" revived my love for the arts
-why i dislike taylor swift
-how white, christians are now the minority
-six word memoirs
-my thoughts and opinions on bad teachers and their methods



yay!
<3

Not Your Average Morning <3

I was up fairly late last night working on my french test and I'm always up the night before it's due because I'm a horrible procrastinator (or shall I say, a great procrastinator) and I wait until the last minute to do my assignments.

Je me suis reveillée à 8:15 ce matin (I woke up at 8:15 this morning).

I had plans to get coffee with my friend Lauren who dropped from our french class because truth be told, it's a ridiculously difficult class. I didn't have a great day in class so I was looking forward to our coffee date and on my way to Starbucks I realized I had a missed call from Eli and a text from him asking if I was still in class. I called him back and he said he wanted to join me and Lauren for coffee. Lauren and I ended up planning for a different day in the end because she woke up late and I had alot to do today and Eli still came to Starbucks and he paid for my coffee :)

We get to my apartment and I told him I wanted to change because though it was nice this morning, it was too hot outside for me to still be wearing jeans and my long-sleeved shirt. He followed me in my room and I assumed he didn't hear me say I needed to get changed...BUT I then noticed there was a single rose on my dresser on top of my Bible. I turned around, and he was standing behind me smiling...SO DARN CUTE and I said to him, "Now, WHO gave me this??" haha Obviously, I knew he had, then I turned to put the rose in my sweet action green vase (SHOUT OUT TO KEMPER LANGFORD FOR THE GREEN VASE) and I noticed there were other roses in my vase, a whole bouquet! AND They were purple! He had another single rose sitting in front of the vase and I thought it was just for decoration until I saw the card attached to the bouquet.
It said, "For the nine months you had to share me with work, Love Eli" and he attached his EMT pin to the card so I get to choose when he goes back to work :)
And then there was the third single rose sitting by my giant picture that my uncle took of us after the Fourth of July celebrations and the picture itself is goofy because it looks all entirely too serious for me and Eli but that's where he put the last rose.

So basically I freaked out and cried a little bit because, for those of you who don't know, Eli's been working soooo hard for the past 9 months as an EMT along with doing school full-time and our relationship has only gotten stronger. It's been an emotional time for the both of us and even for some of the friends we're closer to. Last night was his last shift at Americare so that's why he gave me the roses and everything.


Now we're studying together at a quaint coffee shop off of Bruce B. Downs. Good start to my week :)

<3 Rachel

Creepy Ice Cream Truck Man

STOP DRIVING AROUND MY APARTMENT COMPLEX, NOBODY LIKES YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel insanely unsafe when I hear the demonic sound of an ice cream truck reverberating from the buildings around me. I feel like if he were to pass me on the streets his evil workers who reside inside of the truck would run out, snatch me in the back of the van and drive away and rape me or something. Gosh and WHY THE HELL are they driving around a college apartment anyways?

My freshman year at USF the ice cream man would drive really slow and stare at people as he drove by... I haven't seen the ice cream truck on campus since but OMG I think I'll poop myself if I do.

I swear I'm not making this up, but I remember DISTINCTLY one time the ice cream truck stopped, and 3 girls dressed in baby pink shirts, shorts, and soccer socks ran out of the back and were running around the people near the dorms in the Andros complex on campus and they were getting in people's faces telling them to buy ice cream.
IF BY CHANCE THEY GOT IN MY FACE--I would have punched them in the face and possibly curb-stomped them. Okay Okay, I know that's violent but seriously? Don't get in strangers faces and expect a positive response.


I don't hear the creepy music anymore so maybe he drove away from here.


no love for the ice cream man.

sometimes it's rough

It sucks watching the people you care about suffer.

I hope one day the pain we go through is worth it--it has to be, right?

I Can Shooowww You the WOOORLD

Game night was a success last night. We had a turnout of about 20 people!
At the Marshall Center there was this huge, long line of people waiting to get into this event that none of us had any idea what it was. We took notice that most of the people in line were ghetto fabulous so it was probably an event for black people. It was actually a stepping show in the ballroom...so we were right.

Eli had his guys night last night and wasn't able to participate in game night BUT I'm glad he got to be a man and do manly things. I really don't know what that entails but he definitely needs that time...not that he's not a man! I just feel like he's sad with me sometimes because I'm NOT a guy, I can't fulfill some of his needs because I'm just his girlfriend. Anyway...alot of my friends are engaged (no surprise there) but I'm really thankful that I'm not. I feel like I have so much growing up to do and so does Eli. I'm enjoying being a 20 year old college student and if I were engaged I know for a fact my mind would be elsewhere and not focusing on school, or RUF.

Last night after game night, Sarah Holmes came over to mine, Sarah Monson, and Katie's apartment and we watched Aladdin. I love that Disney movie! We were discussing how when we were little, we didn't realize that they were a part of a totally different culture! There are alot of different things that we didn't pick up on when we were kids...especially when it comes to Disney films hahah.

Today I have much to accomplish.
-practice for Jeff's ordination tomorrow night at Holy Trinity
-a short story to revise
-a french book to read
-a french test to complete
-french extra credit packet
-read A BUTTLOAD of David Copperfield

Dark Chocolate Truffles with Cocoa Cream Filling and Carmelized Cocoa Nibs

absolutely delightful.


today, i do not want to go to class. i feel like i have so much to do and i completely wasted my day yesterday by not doing some stuff for my french class. she wears me out, you know. i have to read this french book, write a 2-4 page paper on it (in french), do the "paris" controle (which is a 2 pg word document of paragraph answer-questions), and i have a huge extra credit project for french as well. annnd that's just for one class. poop. i'm really behind in my british literature reading and the material sucks so it makes it difficult to even want to play catch up.


everyone dies...and i know that...but it's just weird to deal with it. jamie's friend John died last night in a car accident. we were just talking about how that person, who is OUR age (20 yrs old) is meeting his maker. he's either in heaven or in hell right now. it's just overwhelming to think about...i'm scared to die even though i'm a christian. i know that because God is who He is, i can't earn my way to heaven...so yeah i just have to trust in the blood of Christ but that's so hard to trust sometimes. His blood was, is, and always will be enough for thsoe who believe.

my friend nicole who comes to RUF girls bible study has a prayer request today: her boyfriend's grandpa, whom she is close to, has cancer and he's supposed to have surgery next week which has a 50% chance that it will even cure it. he can't have the surgery if he's sick and he was just taken to the emergency room because of discoloration of the skin and a fever.

i just pray for peace for that family and for her boyfriend's grandpa. i hope that he's saved and that he believes and trusts in the Lord. times are hard, always have been and will be. i feel like as i'm getting older i just see it more.

God have mercy on us.

Happy Veteran's Day

Il y a pas de classe aujourd'hui! OUIII!
J'adore les vacances :)


*There is no class today! yesss!
I love the holidays*

Tonight is girl's bible study and we are doing a dinner here at the apt. It's going to be a great time of fellowship and OF COURSE, food!
Eli put in his two-weeks notice a while back and tonight and this coming sunday are his last two shifts. I think he's going to miss it but I know he's missed being a normal college student who wasn't taking a full load of classes AND working 40 hours a week. I don't know what I want to get him for Christmas. I'm not even sure what my family's doing for Christmas this year.
Last year we went to Birmingham, Alabama to see extended family on my mother's side and I always love getting to see them. They are such wonderful people and I'm blessed to even be related to them, in my opinion. It was alot of eating, laughing, a little crying when talking about the struggles and hard times in the past years, but mostly it was just reuniting with family that loves Jesus Christ and cherishes His birth. All of these things made it a wonderful Christmas.

This year's Thanksgiving festivities are taking place at my Mammy and Papa's house. I think my first cousins from NC will be coming down too which I'm very thankful and excited for. I wish I got to see them more often throughout the year. I wish that I got to spend more time with them because a part of me worries for them. I think I don't worry as much for my sisters because I get to see them and keep them in line I guess hahaha, my cousins don't have an older sister with words of wisdom to bestow upon them. haha I just don't want them to get themselves into that awful high school drama that could really come back to bite them.


Il y a beaucoup de choses que je pense.
<3
rachel

frustrated.

I hate being ignored. I also hate it when people dance around the questions I ask because they're hiding something.
I really really really feel so angry when people lie and they think I'm not catching on. It's an insult to my intelligence not to mention if you're lying about something you're probably doing something you shouldn't be doing in the first place.
I've been trying to talk to this person that used to be a close friend of mine and they are never around anymore. I tell them I really need to talk to them and their answer when I ask what they're doing that night is, "uhmm, I don't know...". Okay. Thanks for the cooperation.


Don't claim to be an honest, upfront, Christian and lie, sneak, and avoid being confronted and do things that you once condemned others of doing. We're all hypocrites and I knowww that I've been hypocritical in my past but people have confronted me and I moved on and grew from it. I just don't really know what to do anymore.



classes next semester:
poetry 1
creative non-fiction
brit lit. 1900's
francophone world
french conversation I

50% my rear end

Bonjour tout le monde.
(hello everyone)

I'm afraid I have the case of "The Monday's". I had french class this morning and it went as well as it could I suppose. We are studying "Paris" by dissecting french poetry and watching french commercials. All very interesting but for the past 2 class sessions my teacher has given me 50% out of 100% class participation. THAT is bull-crap. It's fairly useless talking to her about it, too, because she's pretty set in her ways. Lord, give me strength to last through these next few weeks.


I'm alone in my apartment right now; I just got home from RUF girl's lunch at the MSC (marshall student center). I'm obsessed with buying stuff to decorate this place. I hate hate HATE blank, white walls. There's four of us living here though and I do not want to be the only one making decoration purchases. I can't get my mind off of this amazing elephant I found at the Salvation Army thrift store. It was 9 dollars and really a big piece of art...If I'm still thinking about it on Friday, and if it's still there when I go back, I will buy it because then, it was just meant to be. Target is ALSO the bomb. I could go there every day and find something else to buy because they have the coolest/cutest stuff there from clothes, underwear, little trinkets that I really shouldn't buy but I would anyways.

Speaking of random purchases; in the past 2 weeks I have bought 6 movies from blockbuster. They have this amazing deal when you buy 3 movies for 20 bucks. Amaaaazing. I bought Watchmen, Yes Man, He's Just Not That Into You, Away We Go, Gran Torino, and the Soloist. I need a job.


Why do people think sex and drugs are the best things to write about? In my fiction class that's all people seem to write about...and they think it's funny. I feel like I'm in a class of 13 year olds who are experimenting for the first time and it makes me sad. I don't care if you've smoked weed before and did something ridiculous...who hasn't these days? You people are actually part of the norm. *****for the record, I have never smoked pot, smoked a cigarette for that matter, or injected anything into my body***** It's just discouraging because that type of subject is encouraged because it's "naughty" or "taboo". I think it's overrated, and overdone. Write about things that you really care about or things that really interest you! That's what I do, and I'm fairly sure my grades are surpassing most of theirs.



Alright, I guess that's enough for today. Until next time :)

au revoir mes amis!

L'ecrire creatif.

I think this blog would be of better use if I started using it for which I am paying thousands of dollars studying in college. From now on, these blogs MAY or MAY NOT be from actual occurrences in my life, but merely figments of my imagination.



ALSO. I speak in Franglais half the time :)




Next semester looks similar to this one; lots of reading, lots of stress, lots of Rachel not having much time for anything else.



Eli's still my main man <3